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How to Overcome the Human Listening Bias Trap

We tend to only listen to what’s of interest to us.

You have it. I have it. Your friends and neighbors have it. Listening bias. It's a human condition. When people are able to recognize it and lessen its dominance they improve their ability to communicate, process a wider range of information and become more knowledgeable.

What exactly is listening bias? In layman's terms, it's simply listening to what's of interest to us. I found myself guilty while writing this article when Sandy, my wife of 43 years, explained to me which gifts were going to each of our six grandchildren. A few hours later, with all the gifts organized on our dining room table, I asked who's getting what and was blasted with "You didn't hear a word I said. I told you this morning." Ouch. Apparently, either I assumed I knew what she was going to tell me, or it wasn't important enough for me to really listen.

Because we tend to listen to what is of interest to us, many financial advisors spend an inordinate amount of their communication with clients and prospects on financial matters. It stands to reason that financial advisors have a strong financial bias, after all this is your expertise.

Many financial advisors have developed a tendency to tune out the personal elements of a conversation. In their mind, it's not relevant to their expertise in managing money. Think about this for a moment. During a typical client review meeting, what percentage of the time is spent discussing their portfolio? 20 percent? Maybe 35 percent? The response I usually get when I've asked advisors is 10 to 20 percent. You don't need to showcase your financial expertise by going down the rabbit hole of financial-speak. Most clients want to spend time discussing personal matters.

Good listening creates a dialogue that strengthens rapport and leads to an emotional connection. An emotional connection signals an ideal client. This makes it much easier for you to guide them to a decision. However, good listening requires controlling your listening bias.

This might sound complex, but it's relatively simple. The first step is to outline what you want to be listening for and then you simply craft your questions accordingly. This can run the gamut from…

  • How their family handled this holiday season;
  • Names of people within their spheres-of-influence;
  • Identify an investment opportunity or charitable cause;
  • Identify a potential referral alliance partner; or
  • Identify a marketing opportunity. 

The above is designed to get you thinking accordingly and is, by no means, all-inclusive. But "'tis the year" to work your listening bias.

Matt Oechsli is author of Building a Successful 21st Century Financial Practice: Attracting, Servicing & Retaining Affluent Clientswww.oechsli.com

TAGS: Careers
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