Gather around kids, Penny's last speech

No, I don't believe it Penny.  And by the way, you don't pay investment advisors, money managers or brokers with a credit card.  Now you fools on here that contacted her deserve what you get.   Dumb and dumber have met. 

Okay so penny is a lady.. Dont worry we all have women in our lives and we understand how their mood can change as quick as the market.

Funny story. Yesteday I was talking to Bush's number one guy for SE America. He had a team of young ladies promoting Kilgore in VA. Well when they lost I saw them come down and more or less about to cry. So I decided to say "hey, are you sad?" One was like "get the hell away from us." Well I then stated "I was a liberal and its only an election."

I was really just trying to make them laugh. After another one liner from the one I stated I liked BUSH and the republican party. After a minute I had them on my side. It was fun and I just tried to stress one will win and lose some. You did the best you can do so get ready for the next battle and enjoy life.  Just used a bit of charm with the ladies and had em smiling!

Random story…

I think it was Put Trader in drag.

Ahhh, Put Trader.  I kinda miss ol’ Put, he kept things interesting.

Maybe Put was disguised as Penny.

Neither of them seemed to know much.

Penny:

First of all it is entirely illegal to give investment advice to anyone over the internet. Which is why I haven't responded to your request for financial advice. You may not be in a state that I am licensed in which makes it illegal and then there is a little rule called know your customer.  Alll I know about you is pixels on the screen.  That being said.  I also wouldn't want to pay 600$ a month unless I was getting some good advice on more than just investments.   

I am serious about the information thieves.  I can't tell you how many times I have met with prospects, spent hours of my time to prepare for a meeting, possibly even drove many miles to get to the location, as did the poor sap that you rewarded with a glass of tea, only to be told they don't want to pay me, don't want to be charged commissions.  But they are mor than willing to take the information that I have given them and use it elsewhere.  Excuuuuse me!!! My time is not free, the hard earned information that I have inside my head is not free.  When you come on as "I don't want to pay anything", how can we not be pissed at you.   Would you go the mechanic and ask him to fix your car for nothing?

There are several ways people can invest

1. You can pay as you go with commissions on each trade.  If you don't trade very much and your portfolio is buy and hold you may save some money this way. But you aren't going to get a lot of attention from the broker.  These types are constantly needing to make trades to keep their income up.  We do have to eat and pay the rent you know.

2. You can pay a flat fee or an hourly fee.  If you trade a lot you may come out better cost wise vs pay as you go. Plus the advisor has more vested interest in growing your portfolio as the next years % fee will be better for him.  A steady stream of income allows the advisor to concentrate more attention on his existing clients and provide a much higher level of service.

3. You can buy investments on line.  You are on your own and don't come askinng for free advice from #1 or #2

If you think that just buying stocks, bonds and mutual funds is all we do, you are wrong.  A good advisor (usually category 2) will also be concerned about your estate planning needs, your long term care issues, funding your children or grandchildren's college, reducing your taxes, helping you manage your budget, advising you on debt control, insurance issues including property, health and life insurance and you as a person.  You might get some of that from #1 and you will get none of that from #3.  

You get what you pay for  and respect is a two way street.

I bet Babbling Looney is a MILF...

Great Post! 

she is…at least in my mind, and I’m going to keep it that way.

LOL!!!!!  I looked it up.  Yep.  My husband thinks so.

[quote=BankFC]

I bet Babbling Looney is a MILF...

Great Post! 

[/quote]

Penny would find that comment to be disrespectful....!

And yes, it was a great post!

HAHAHAHA----MILF I love it!    

Still have not accomplished a MILF yet....

[quote=babbling looney]

I am serious about the information thieves.  I can't tell you how many times I have met with prospects, spent hours of my time to prepare for a meeting, possibly even drove many miles to get to the location, as did the poor sap that you rewarded with a glass of tea, only to be told they don't want to pay me, don't want to be charged commissions.  But they are mor than willing to take the information that I have given them and use it elsewhere.  Excuuuuse me!!! My time is not free, the hard earned information that I have inside my head is not free.  When you come on as "I don't want to pay anything", how can we not be pissed at you.   Would you go the mechanic and ask him to fix your car for nothing?

[/quote]

[quote=BankFC]

I bet Babbling Looney is a MILF...

[/quote]

LOL!!! Post of the year.  Nice work BankFC.

[quote=BankFC]

I bet Babbling Looney is a MILF...

[/quote]

I'm guessing a cross between Cameron Diaz (attractive, fun and kind), and Lileth from cheers (intelligent & witty).....although?? she did have to google "MILF"

Wow! This is fun.  Throw in a little Bonnie Raitt and you have it.  I was a professional musician/singer for a while in my misspent youth

OH MY GAWD!!

You guys are starting to be bigger pains in the butt than I am.   Okay, get your listening ears on and I'll talk real loud I AM NOT ASKING FOR YOU TO BE MY FINANCIAL ADVISOR FOR FREE.    I AM NOT ASKING FOR ANYTHING THAT IS GOING TO REQUIRE YOU TO SPEND TIME RESEARCHING, DRAWING UP PAPERWORK, ANYTHING THAT WOULD REQUIRE ME TO GIVE YOU SPECIFICS ABOUT ME IN ORDER TO PROCEED.   GET IT????  GET IT???? GET IT???? 

It's like calling the mechanic, telling him/her that my car is broke, here's what's going on with it.   Can you suggest a place that specializes in this problem?  How do I get there and how much will it cost.   What do you think about me fixing it myself?  So in the case here, it would be like the mechanic saying, "I'm not going to tell you that.  You'll have to pay me!  I've worked hard to know that information....etc etc etc etc etc.    If the mechanic fixed my car because I thought he had a reasonable price, I would have no problem paying him.   I am in the service industry too. 

I'm only asking for direction.

Babs, you spent way too much of your precious time bitching about this whole pay thing and your expertise and how you don't like wasting your time (ironically)  and then turn around and give me 1 2 and 3.   1  2 and 3 is all I'm asking for, and THANK YOU!  All of you tearing me apart about this fee thing, have given me what I asked for.   Sometimes not very nice, but none the less you have.  

I have a feeling that commissions and such in your world are a very very sensitive subject and I poured gas on that fire.   I gave you a reason to jump on your soap boxes and get all that stuff off your chests you've been carrying around.   It's fun to get all worked up sometimes, isn't it?  Maybe I should send you a bill for that.  (Just kidding, please don't start again)

By the way, MILF comments don't offend me, I welcome them all the time too.    I'll bet you guys have me pictured as a nasty old fat scank so it's easier to sling the mud.  

Okay, bring on the next set of misinterpretations and insults. 

Penny

No misinterpretation here.  You're a moron.  Plain and simple.  You want to move 600k out of ML into Ameritrade?  LOL!!  Good luck!!

Even AFTER the "big" fees at Merrill you still will be making a much bigger return than you would at Investments'R'us. 

Anyways, I have to be going.  My doctor is charging me wayyyy too much so I've decided just to read a bunch of info on WebMD.com and make my own diagnosis.  Hopefully this rash doesn't keep spreading...    

Thank you sir, can I have another.

WHY, is it so difficult for you all to simply say, "You know,
that might not be such a good idea and here is why" I've already been called
enough F-ing names here about that I GET IT!- I've already been
informed here, over and over. If you need
someplace to let off steam, go kick your dog or something. And again, I
appreciate those of you who correspond in a respectful mannor.

YOU"RE A MORON and you SUCK at communication, you A$$HOLE!

You don't do anything but tarnish the reputation of your profession when
you act so UNPROFESSIONALLY.

YOU are a rash....

Penny, et al,

Thanks for bringing some life to this forum...funny stuff...

Penny-

I thought you already made your last speech at the top of this thread?

I, for one, had not figured you to be a fat ole' skank, or even a bad person.  You could very well be a MILF for all I know!  Mabye a little high-maintenance from an attitudinal standpoint, but that's all.  Not meaning that as a nasty shot or anything.  Some of my favorite clients can be a handful from time to time.

I'm glad that Babs' post helped you, even as she was giving you an earful.  I dont know her personally, but she is a long time contributor to this board as am I, and I think she's a pretty classy gal.  I suspect we'd get along just fine if we ever cross paths out there at a conference or whatever.  She's also pretty damn smart!

As for some of the other comments that were made towards you on this board, let me point out to you that:

1.) This is largely intended as an industry board.  You came in as a customer/consumer seeking our advice, and alluding directly to a hot topic.

2.) This board is open to anyone, including some who may have been in the industry for only a few months or years, and their perspective and attitude might be considerably different from myself or babs or some others.  Most of us are sick and tired of folks who only care about COST, not about the value received.  (Then again some of us in the business do such a poor job of delivering value that perhaps we deserve it.)

3.)In your first post, you essentially said: "Hey, I was totally overwhelmed, and now I've studied enough on my own to realize that I'm not getting a very good deal.  So, what do you folks think about me trying to do this on my own at Ameritrade, and oh by the way what suggestions do you folks have about how I can minimize my costs to transfer a large amount of money to your competitor who always advertises about how cheap they are and how much you full-service guys suck?"  I'm not sure if you meant it to come across that way, but that's how it sorta seemed to me.  Just being honest.

So, what did you expect in terms of how folks might respond?

Anyone, by the way, who is either trying to solicit your business or trying to provide anything but the most general guidance to you on this forum would be making a pretty big mistake, as it is likely in violation of their fim's policies and probably also illegal, depending upon where they are licensed and where you are.  It would also be directly in violation of NASD/SEC 'know your customer' requirements, for what that's worth.

I sorta see what you're saying about the mechaninc analogy, but you need to walk a mile in our shoes too.

FWIW, that guy from Houston, if he knows what he's doing.....that 1% isn't a bad deal at all.  In fact, if he and his Dad know how to navigate these markets, it's likely a BARGAIN!  This is not an amateurs market these days!

"nuf said.  Good luck to ya!

Joe,

I thought I was done too, but you guys keep making it hard for me to sit still and be quiet.  Yes, I agree about Babs.   I had read through other posts a few days ago and figured out she was way cool and  smart.   Even though she let loose on me, I still respect her and I told her so.  I have decided to go with my guy that visited me.  You all, good and bad, helped me see the value in him.  

I never intended to call anyone that PM'd me, just trying to make a few of you uncomfortable with the thought.  Worked on a few.  

I have been trying to balance value and cost and get an idea of what each means to me personally.   I came in here juggling all this and I got it now.   

P-

.....I think Penny is hooked.....

Penny, as it has been suggested in other response to you......any advisor worth their salt, is going to want 1% (it's the going rate), and there are too many clients who need the service, and are agreeable to the rate - to make concessions. Merrill is a great firm, that can utilize a vast amount of tools to help you get where you are going. You may have a not so great advisor. That does not mean Merrill is the problem......

Scorpio.....Merrill's fees are no more than anyone else. Do you honestly think anyone in this day and age, Firm or Advisor is going to price themselves out of the competition.

Penny, stay away from insurance companies and bank brokers, in an investment capacity. They have little options, and a ton of proprietary slant (they push there own products - whether it's right for you or not). Your account of $600,000 would be considered a good piece of business by anyone....except the Goldman types (5-10 million dollar minimums).   

Merrill, Smith Barney, UBS, Morgan, AG Edwards,Raymond James, Local planners (these are guys who typically used to work at banks or large firms - who wanted a more independent - non corporate environment / like the attorney who leaves a firm to run his own practice) and yes even Edward Jones, can do the job for you. It really is the person not the place. Don't think that just because a guy has letters after his name CFP, CFA, CIMA etc, that you are golden. It helps.....but it is no guarantee of performance or service. Set your sights on 8-10% returns over time. Some years may be 15% others 2%. Not many quality portfolios will see less than an "average" return of 8 - 10 % over a 10 year period.

For 1 %, you should expect 2 face to face consultations per year, and a phone call at least 5-6 times during the year, to discuss progress, opportunity, and risk. If at the end of one year, you are not happy with the service....fire him or her.

Now finally...............what do you look like.

Great stuff and I’m glad we’re all friends again.  Good luck, Penny…I think your decision to hire an advisor (and hopefully a very good one), is a wise one…

[quote=moneyadvisor]

.....I think Penny is hooked.....

Penny, as it has been suggested in other response to you......any advisor worth their salt, is going to want 1% (it's the going rate), and there are too many clients who need the service, and are agreeable to the rate - to make concessions. Merrill is a great firm, that can utilize a vast amount of tools to help you get where you are going. You may have a not so great advisor. That does not mean Merrill is the problem......

Scorpio.....Merrill's fees are no more than anyone else. Do you honestly think anyone in this day and age, Firm or Advisor is going to price themselves out of the competition.

Penny, stay away from insurance companies and bank brokers, in an investment capacity. They have little options, and a ton of proprietary slant (they push there own products - whether it's right for you or not). Your account of $600,000 would be considered a good piece of business by anyone....except the Goldman types (5-10 million dollar minimums).   

Merrill, Smith Barney, UBS, Morgan, AG Edwards,Raymond James, Local planners (these are guys who typically used to work at banks or large firms - who wanted a more independent - non corporate environment / like the attorney who leaves a firm to run his own practice) and yes even Edward Jones, can do the job for you. It really is the person not the place. Don't think that just because a guy has letters after his name CFP, CFA, CIMA etc, that you are golden. It helps.....but it is no guarantee of performance or service. Set your sights on 8-10% returns over time. Some years may be 15% others 2%. Not many quality portfolios will see less than an "average" return of 8 - 10 % over a 10 year period.

For 1 %, you should expect 2 face to face consultations per year, and a phone call at least 5-6 times during the year, to discuss progress, opportunity, and risk. If at the end of one year, you are not happy with the service....fire him or her.

Now finally...............what do you look like.

[/quote]

Silly man....of course Merril's fees are higher when you consider:

1.) The level of all their 'nuisance fees', such as mandatory central asset accounts(RMA still?) with an annual fee, higher IRA fees, higher account termination fees, etc.

2.) The level of service you receive for the money you pay, unless you happen to be a 'mega client'.   This is a natural consequence of the higher production thresholds per advisor.

JDB,

You don't know what you are talking about.

IRA's over $50,000 are free for life. Up tp max $100 per year under $50,000. We never said we were bottom feeders. If a client is going to bitch about $50 to $100 fees, they honestly, and truly should go elsewhere. You know who bitches about $50.00,.......$50,000 and less clients.

Service accusations???? what is your basis for knowing who gives what service. Anyone who is honest and intelligent knows,...that you could get great service and real bank for the buck from the right person, at any firm. And you could get lousy service, and pay high fees anywhere. Service is a personal, case by case intangible. Firms try and promote service and process, but the advisor delivers the service.   

Joe, there are different platforms at places like Merrill, to accomodate various types of clients. To say that Merrill's fees are high....is ignorant.

I think anyone would agree.....A $150,000 account with 6 mutual funds is not going to take up alot of time, but they are still respected as a good client. A ten million dollar account, with estate issues and a certain level of complexity.....is going to take more time and effort. It's relative.....joe. 

You could be right though,......Merrill has the highest rankings accross the board...........because they are expensive and give lousy service.

[quote=moneyadvisor]

JDB,

You don't know what you are talking about.

IRA's over $50,000 are free for life. Up tp max $100 per year under $50,000. We never said we were bottom feeders. If a client is going to bitch about $50 to $100 fees, they honestly, and truly should go elsewhere. You know who bitches about $50.00,.......$50,000 and less clients.

Service accusations???? what is your basis for knowing who gives what service. Anyone who is honest and intelligent knows,...that you could get great service and real bank for the buck from the right person, at any firm. And you could get lousy service, and pay high fees anywhere. Service is a personal, case by case intangible. Firms try and promote service and process, but the advisor delivers the service.   

Joe, there are different platforms at places like Merrill, to accomodate various types of clients. To say that Merrill's fees are high....is ignorant.

I think anyone would agree.....A $150,000 account with 6 mutual funds is not going to take up alot of time, but they are still respected as a good client. A ten million dollar account, with estate issues and a certain level of complexity.....is going to take more time and effort. It's relative.....joe. 

You could be right though,......Merrill has the highest rankings accross the board...........because they are expensive and give lousy service.

[/quote]

Ouch sounds like I touched a nerve!

Sounds like y'all have rationalized your fee structure somewhat since the last time I had a look at it.  Good for you!

How's that call center lawsuit going anyway?

I haven’t seen this much activity on a post since Put Trader got kicked out.

[quote=joedabrkr][quote=moneyadvisor]

How's that call center lawsuit going anyway?

[/quote]

Isolated, individual actions,....not firm policy.

Keep looking though.

[quote=pennypnch] I AM NOT ASKING FOR YOU TO BE MY FINANCIAL ADVISOR FOR FREE.  [/quote]

Let's not try to rewrite history, Penny. The first thing you asked when you came to this forum was how to avoid costs and fees.

Mr. Mike,

The cost and fee avoidance had to do with me liquidating 650K in order to do an asset transfer.   Such as turning an investment into some other type of investment (within ML) where costs to transfer assets were less.   It always seems like there are little loop holes here and there, especially with taxes, just wondering. (I'll bet there probably is - I challenge you to find it, not for my benefit, because by the time you do, I'll be done with my stuff.  Challenge yourself)   Trust me, I've already paid ML enough in fees.  I cringed at the thought of having to fork over more in my effort to get away to avoid more fees.   Do you get it?   Had nothing to do with not paying someone else to take over managing my money.   I apologize, I didn't think I had made it that difficult to understand.  

Have a good weekend,

P-

Just for fun, and to prove what a quick learner I am, I am guessing someone will come back and tell me how stupid I am for thinking there is a possibility of changing an account into something else to ..... bla bla bla,  

Ha, ha.   Okay, believe it or not, I'm going out, on a date, with my mate.  Didn't want you all to think I don't have a life, being here online at 9pm and all.   

This has become like a bad drug for me.   I'll need therapy now.   Anyone know a therapist that works for free???  

TGIF, 

P

[quote=pennypnch]

Just for fun, and to prove what a quick learner I am, I am guessing someone will come back and tell me how stupid I am for thinking there is a possibility of changing an account into something else to ..... bla bla bla,  

Ha, ha.   Okay, believe it or not, I'm going out, on a date, with my mate.  Didn't want you all to think I don't have a life, being here online at 9pm and all.   

This has become like a bad drug for me.   I'll need therapy now.   Anyone know a therapist that works for free???  

TGIF, 

P

[/quote]

Good one Penny!

Have a nice date! ;-)  So are you really a MILF?

Did anyone else notice how excitable Penny got, right after the focus turned to whether Babs was a MILF? .........Typical girl behavior.

Penny, I do believe you have learned a good deal from this. Painful as it may have seemed to you. But......it did not cost you a cent (no offense)

Oh stop it, you silly trouble maker.   

And, Du, I know it didn't cost me a cent.   Do you always state the obvious?......Typical silly little boy behavior.    

My 5 year old son does it all the time and I say to him..... "And now it's time for the totally obvious news flash by...."  

Penny,

Hang on to that six hundy, I doubt you'll see that kind of coin again.

I'll get what I want in the end, just like I did here.  (Now THAT's a typical woman, Money Advisor )  I'll have fun along the way, just like I did here. (That's typical me, I always have fun)   I'm sure I'll meet nice people as well as jerks, just like I did here. 

I have a fabulous life I love, and I laugh at the crazy assumptions about me and my life that I get here, ESPECIALLY those PM one's!  

Penny-

I must say now I’m dying of curiousity to see what these “PM assumptions” were…

I’m sure a couple of mine were at the top of the list…



I didn’t mean any harm Penny, its just that you are an advisor’s worst nightmare. 

[quote=Scorpio]I'm sure a couple of mine were at the top of the list...

I didn't mean any harm Penny, its just that you are an advisor's worst nightmare. 
[/quote]

Smooch, Scorp! !  No hard feelings.  You could never do me harm anyway (unless I hired you, )  Have a great career!! 

P-

[quote=pennypnch]

[quote=Scorpio]I'm sure a couple of mine were at the top of the list...

I didn't mean any harm Penny, its just that you are an advisor's worst nightmare. 
[/quote]

Smooch, Scorp! !  No hard feelings.  You could never do me harm anyway (unless I hired you, )  Have a great career!! 

P-

[/quote]

[quote=moneyadvisor]

.....I think Penny is hooked.....      ON WHAT?  Your priceless free advise???

Penny, as it has been suggested in other response to you......any advisor worth their salt, is going to want 1% (it's the going rate), and there are too many clients who need the service, and are agreeable to the rate - to make concessions. Merrill is a great firm, that can utilize a vast amount of tools to help you get where you are going. You may have a not so great advisor. That does not mean Merrill is the problem......Of course not...   By the way, do you work for ML?? 

Scorpio.....Merrill's fees are no more than anyone else. Do you honestly think anyone in this day and age, Firm or Advisor is going to price themselves out of the competition.   Is this a trick question??   Really??? Penny

Penny, stay away from insurance companies and bank brokers, in an investment capacity. They have little options, and a ton of proprietary slant  (they push there own products - whether it's right for you or not) (WOW that scenario has NEVER happened to me before!!). Your account of $600,000 would be considered a good piece of business by anyone....except the Goldman types (5-10 million dollar minimums).    (Glad you added that.  Just in case I was stashing another 4.4 mil. that info would have come in handy.)

Merrill, Smith Barney, UBS, Morgan, AG Edwards,Raymond James, Local planners (these are guys who typically used to work at banks or large firms - who wanted a more independent - non corporate environment / like the attorney who leaves a firm to run his own practice) -- and yes even Edward Jones, can do the job for you. It really is the person not the place.  ( I agree on this point.  You have good people in bad places, and bad people in good places.  It's a crap shoot for us common folk.)  Don't think that just because a guy has letters after his name CFP, CFA, CIMA etc, that you are golden. It helps.....but it is no guarantee of performance or service. Set your sights on 8-10% returns over time. Some years may be 15% others 2%. Not many quality portfolios will see less than an "average" return of 8 - 10 % over a 10 year period.

For 1 %, you should expect 2 face to face consultations per year, ( I expect quarterly reviews - personally, after initial consultation at the very least)and a phone call at least 5-6 times during the year, (insert snicker here)to discuss progress, opportunity, and risk. If at the end of one year, you are not happy with the service....fire him or her.

Now finally...............what do you look like.  Like I need a new way to invest MY money.

Sorry, by BS filter was busted tonight. 

Penny

Penny,

Very infrequently does someone of your ........let's say.........Character ...come along. good luck.

Hey Penny,

Do you have any daughters?  I'd LOVE to 'meet' them......

Penny seems a little high maintenance.... even to me.

This explains a lot.

PS. Penny, nothing personal.  High maintenance can be good in some situations, just not in an advisor/client one.

Wow, just re-read my last post.  I'll be writing myself a sticky note to put on my monitor to remind me not to drink and forum chat, obviously not a good combo.    A little red wine apparently makes me too big for my britches.     

I think we've all had enough here.   You guys were fun and thanks for all the advise.  

Penny

Its “advice”.

If you're really a MILF, I'll handle your acct for 50pbs and some hand action every quarter.

Don’t let JoedaBroker hear you…he got a real rise out of Penny.

[quote=skeedaddy]Don't let JoedaBroker hear you...he got a real rise out of Penny. [/quote]

or did Penny get a 'rise' out of you?

She never answered when I asked if she was a MILF..... ;-)

So are you Penny?

No…but I wouldn’t bend down in front of you. So which do you like better,

Cialis or Viagra?

[quote=skeedaddy]No...but I wouldn't bend down in front of you. So which do you like better,
Cialis or Viagra? [/quote]

I haven't needed to try either one!

And I rather doubt you're my type.  I prefer women, and generally intelligent ones. 

My mistake…you intended “ARE you Penny?” I misread as "are YOU Penny?"

I thought you might have been hitting the booz early.



Either way, I had a great day with NASDAQ +32.59. Finally, YHOO is

awakened. Thank God for fat people and their insecurities, Nutrisystems,

NTRI is on fuego   



P.S. Penny…if you like the market and appreciate an advisor that puts his

money where his mouth is, then PM me and we can explore the possibility of

working together.

you guys just can't help yourselves, can you?  still pimpin'

I hope your compliance folks don't see that....

This lady would be the client from hell. 

Yes, I would.... but you'd still love me!