Once Ken Lewis buys ML he should fire

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Dec 3, 2008 7:54 pm

How 'bout the "regional" and "district" directors?  They make millions.  I say we replace them with college interns that send out emails around the holidays that say:

 
"At this time of the year, let's remember whats important"
 
"I appreciate your dedication and efforts in this environment"
 
"You are what makes this firm special"
 
"We have plenty of capital and our stock is undervalued" Oopps: Scratch this one
 
 
Thoughts or other suggestions for Ken?
Dec 3, 2008 7:55 pm

Great Post!!!

Dec 3, 2008 8:42 pm

Fire the CM's or stick them back into the banking centers as tellers.

Dec 3, 2008 9:23 pm

Maybe he should look in the mirror. He clearly overpaid, in this environment and has massively diluted shareholders' equity. How in the world is he going to continue paying the dividend with even more shares added? He keeps cheering a model that his company (or he) will not let work. They are back to the silo system and will always go bak to the silo system in slightly tough times.

Dec 3, 2008 10:38 pm

Funniest f#*!ing post!  I swear that is all our directors do.  Well, that along with always spelling words incorrectly and never forwarding anything but the positive articles on ML.

Dec 3, 2008 11:38 pm

Is there any company in the securities industry that couldn't benefit from slashing a few layers of middle management? It's not just the money but increase in red tape created by mindless bureaucrats that causes such difficulty in getting anything done, let alone getting paid. One more reason to go indy.

Dec 4, 2008 12:57 am

A classic post! Well done! 

Dec 4, 2008 12:59 am

Does anybody know the difference between being a broker in a BAC banking center and the BAC FA's who work in the wirehouse setting and rely on the CM's.  What are the positions called?  Which is a better gig?

Dec 4, 2008 2:39 am

This post is great! I agree stick the CM's back on the teller line cause after there Q3 & Q4 comp was cut they aren't referring jack!! Ken should have all managment take a $1 annual salary next year! Ha can you imagine.   Until the they actually align the CMs and FAs with the bankers then it will always remain an up hill battle. How many of you were sold down the river on the point that you would recieve refferals? LOL boy are the Merril brokers in for a rude awakening. I can't wait for them to stick there hands out and when they look down to see what's in their hand it will be hot and steaming! Get my drift....   

Dec 4, 2008 7:26 am

The difference between an FA and a CM or Regional is tantamount the same as the differnce between a drunk and an alcoholic; the drunk doesen't have to go to those damn meetings!

Dec 4, 2008 8:02 am

its tantamount

Dec 4, 2008 8:26 am

What about the "finance and credit specialist"? or any specialist as far as that goes- our "insurance specialist" sits in my office and I am not sure what he does (except talk to the new trainees!).  This whole "specialist system" seems like a huge waste of money to me.  Just another layer of people that have to be paid. 




 
Most of these people are "specialists" because they couldn't be successful on their own.  So they joined the ML Pyramid Scheme where everyone gets paid- courtesy of you and me!!
Dec 4, 2008 11:55 am
Dec 4, 2008 8:16 pm


The person in the office who only sends out emails about "E-Delivery"..........

While I can deal with these things once a quarter, any more than that just reminds me where some of my production is going................






Dec 4, 2008 10:42 pm

It'll go like this from mid mgmt:

"You have to take this opportunity to contact all your clients, sit down w/them and set up an investment policy. (Try and deflect all questions about how they thought you already had one).  Then you steer them towards a managed portfolio (thereby admitting that you know nothing, but the "experts" will take great care to invest for them).  Gloss over the fact that ALL of the above have sucked, and underperformed the averages.  Then bring in the trust, lending, estate planning (i.e. insurance) specialists and let them loose on the clients.  Then go out and gather more assets for the "specialists" to screw up with.  Don't forget, annuitize, annuitize and annuitize, after all, there is nothing a client likes more than watching their investments get flushed down the toilet & have the pleasure of being billed quartely for the privelege.  Then, don't forget "situational teaming", or hooking up w/bigger brokers who have gotten their retention package $$. 

Oh, and don't forget to share your new title w/your clients:  you've gone from Financial Advisors to Chemical Engineers, after all, you have successfully turned their good $$ into shit.