A monkey, a skunk, and Eddie Jones

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May 11, 2007 3:09 am

 Well boys, I'm back to eat my crow. No ketchup please, I'll just eat it raw: feathers and all.


  I'm now gonna tell you the story of how this Texas Jehovah Warrior feels like a monkey butt-screwing a skunk.


  I met several times with and got an offer a few weeks back from a wirehouse.  I thought it over, for a long, long, long time.  Read my posts on this site.  Yep, there I went, sucking off Jones again.    


  I've been meeting EDJ expectations every month of production but six (four of which was while I begged for my office to get opened up).  I'm the last of my training class.  I feel like a confederate soldier on the Gettysburg battlefield after Pickets Charge: alone, alone, on a wide-wide sea.


 In fact, the BM at the wire jokingly stated they were interested in me because they were all so impressed I had lasted as long as I have at EDJ.  It appears they had a bet in their office about my tenure at EDJ  -I got mixed feelings about that one. 


 I'm the first and last man to open an EDJ office in my city in the past 6 yrs.


 The wirehouse BM told me, "son, i've seen your dedication.  You are going to make it in this business no matter where you are."  That made me feel better than anything any man has ever said to me. 


Then he started telling me about the opportunities to join a "team".   He didn't offer me money to try and crook the book.  Instead he offered me a salary for two years.  I liked the BM a lot.


 I've seen several IR's, I mean FA's, at EDJ who weren't qualified to wash my jock inherit 35+ million offices, their wives quit work, heard them boast of maxing out their 401k and Roth IRA's.  I've seen the Regional Leader hold them up like production superstars, and ask the audience if we would like one of these porn-style fluffers to call us with their best sales ideas.  Why can't we all be just like the porn star fluffers?


  Well, I told the wirehouse who offered me the job three weeks ago, No. 


  I'm a Texas boy, and I'm loyal to my brand.  Edward Jones gave me the opportunity to be a broker.  The BM told me he appreciated me being a stand up guy, and that he respected my decision, and if I ever change my mind, to give him a call.


  At EDJ they've worked me like a rent mule: walking streets like a fool, working until 8pm for nights on end.  But they gave me the opportunity.  I thank them for that.  


  Then, all these little pity ass kick-back checks (I mean Revenue Sharing checks) starting arriving to my clients. "What is this for?" they would call, stop-by and ask.  Well, I would tell them the truth, and then I started calling STL and asking about what to do with them.  I got pretty upset with the folks in STL.  I was asking 5 people the same question, and getting back 6 different answers.   You never call STL and ask only one person.  Call a couple of times and see if there is any consistency to the answer.


  And then, my clients started showing up with class action lawsuit papers from the state of Missouri.  Are the two related?  Hell, I don't know.  EDJ is getting hit from so many directions, I feel like I'm sleeping with Mike Tyson!  So what did I do?  I called STL.    Yep, you guessed it, talked to five people and got six different answers.


  Now, I consider myself a straight talker.  I ain't being compensated well enough, and wasn't given any assets to be Jim Piddles Yes-Man.  When I get going, I tell you what I think.  I think I must have upset someone in STL. 


 Well, guess who showed up the very next day at my office?  You guessed it: the EDJ Internal Compliance Nazi. Coincidence? 


  He was there at 7:50AM, waiting on me.  Yep, he came in turned my office every-which-way-but-loose, but my office is too tight to find anything wrong.  And then he had a really stern talk with me about how all FA's are required to tell every prospect about account bonuses, revenue sharing, diversification trips, LP possibilities, every way we get compensated, etc....  Of course I tell my prospects and clients all of this.  Doesn't every koolaid sucker?


 How many of you Koolaid suckers are telling all this to your prospects?  Yeah, right.  Why don't you just tell them to run like hell.


 Since tax season ended, I've been playing a little golf.  I'm soul searching while i'm playing.   Jones told me the first two years are hell.  They weren't lying.  But the third and fourth year ain't too much better.  So i'm taking a little me time now. 


 The quiet of the golf course helps me focus my mind -and i meet the occassional rich guy too.  Try it.  I really enjoy it.  I like to get away from the office and think about my place in this business.  I think about what you guys write here while I'm out there too. 


  I went to play golf immediately after the EDJ audit Nazi left my office.  I came to a conclusion while I was on the 9th green: I am feeling like a monkey butt-screwing a skunk:  I ain't sure that I am finished, but I feel like i've had enough! 


 I reestablished contact w/ the wire last week.  I'm pretty sure i'm gonna do it.  I'm sure EDJ won't miss my assets.  I don't think I care if they come or not.  In fact, the wire said they didn't much care either.  Man, what does that say about EDJ? 


  My damn feet hurt,


 ED

May 11, 2007 4:23 am

ok. calm down. be patient, dilligent and focused. when and if you do this make sue everything is in order. pm i have thoughts if you need them.


May 11, 2007 8:19 am
skolbrother:

sue everything


Get a good attorney first.

May 11, 2007 8:50 am

Ed Jo,


It was only a matter of time before the truth would become known to you.  Jones doesn't want to give you info to make you a better broker or to be able to do the right things for your clients, they want to feed you the company BS just to get you to hang in there with them.  I came from a state where unknown to me, when I first started, that charged a state tax (this is a state with no income tax) on tax-free bonds from other states.  The vet whose office I was working in didn't tell me, the home office didn't tell me, and my first ever sale at eval grad was an out of state tax-free bond to a friend of one of my 125 contacts.  I had never met the man and I sold him something he didn't need. It was one of the infamous Jones 30 year bonds (and he was 83 and suitability didn't blink an eye) so you know what the value did right off the bat. When I found out that he would be taxed on his tax-free bond, I was pissed.  I asked the vet and he said "well, since you asked about it, I'll tell you."  What a mentor.  Don't tell them anything that would discourage them from selling the crap in our inventory.  It took 2 years to get him out of that piece of crap bond, but I did get every penny he invested back.


Moral of the story, Jones doesn't want you to be a trained broker, they want you to sell the products they buy for their inventory whether or not it's proper for your clients.


EdJo...I say go young man and be happy.  Get out, and take as much of YOUR BOOK as you can. Tell your clients that you are leaving because of the facts that all of the crap that led up to these check and the class action suits have been hidden from you and that you can't stand for anything less than 100% of the truth.

May 11, 2007 8:56 am

Wow!!  I feel as if your me a year ago!  I feel and or felt every word you wrote.  I can tell you straight up...you will sleep like a baby the day you decide to leave the cult.  I'm not here to convince you to move to indy or wire...but it's a total different world out here.  You will be about 2x as mad after you leave than now.  You will see how the cult fogged the mirrors in your world.  Good Luck.  I sincerely mean this.

May 11, 2007 10:20 am

Luke,


Come to the dark side (indy).


Darth

May 11, 2007 10:28 am

EDJO-


You appear to have all the qualifications to be independent. Although a salary is tempting, you might be suprised to find that Jones has provided you with the training to be independent and flourish.


After eight months from Jones, I am on track to have my third best month ever in the business. The other two were during the first five months of independence. I am not doing anything differently yet, but keeping much more of the hard earned dollars, and providing clients with total objectivity.


 Although the courting BM seems like a nice guy, I would caution you to hold off making any decisions until you have some more golf time and think about the implication of working for someone else. Is that where you imagine yourself in 5 or 10 years? Read Fragrasso's book. Do your due diligence before you leap. Make this your last move, not just a transition.


Your message was very powerful. It brings it down to the core of what's seriously wrong with Jones. I was there almost 10 years and at the end, I couldn't stand going to the office. Good luck and thanks for the reminder.

May 11, 2007 10:31 am

I agree with bspears. When I left jones it was as though a weight was lifted off my chest. I got in this business to help clients achieve their goals. One of the ways I could do that was to learn as much as possible, but when I started my field trainer and mentor told me that I didn't need to know the difference between a,b,c shares, don't sell stocks only american funds, etc. That's when a bulb lit in my head that I may need to make a change. I did my time but when I left and went indy, it was a whole new world. Bottom line Ed, go with your heart. Do what's best for your clients and well as yourself.

May 11, 2007 12:37 pm
EdJehovah:

 Well boys, I'm back to eat my crow. No ketchup please, I'll just eat it raw: feathers and all.


  I'm now gonna tell you the story of how this Texas Jehovah Warrior feels like a monkey butt-screwing a skunk.


  I met several times with and got an offer a few weeks back from a wirehouse.  I thought it over, for a long, long, long time.  Read my posts on this site.  Yep, there I went, sucking off Jones again.    


  I've been meeting EDJ expectations every month of production but six (four of which was while I begged for my office to get opened up).  I'm the last of my training class.  I feel like a confederate soldier on the Gettysburg battlefield after Pickets Charge: alone, alone, on a wide-wide sea.


 In fact, the BM at the wire jokingly stated they were interested in me because they were all so impressed I had lasted as long as I have at EDJ.  It appears they had a bet in their office about my tenure at EDJ  -I got mixed feelings about that one. 


 I'm the first and last man to open an EDJ office in my city in the past 6 yrs.


 The wirehouse BM told me, "son, i've seen your dedication.  You are going to make it in this business no matter where you are."  That made me feel better than anything any man has ever said to me. 


Then he started telling me about the opportunities to join a "team".   He didn't offer me money to try and crook the book.  Instead he offered me a salary for two years.  I liked the BM a lot.


 I've seen several IR's, I mean FA's, at EDJ who weren't qualified to wash my jock inherit 35+ million offices, their wives quit work, heard them boast of maxing out their 401k and Roth IRA's.  I've seen the Regional Leader hold them up like production superstars, and ask the audience if we would like one of these porn-style fluffers to call us with their best sales ideas.  Why can't we all be just like the porn star fluffers?


  Well, I told the wirehouse who offered me the job three weeks ago, No. 


  I'm a Texas boy, and I'm loyal to my brand.  Edward Jones gave me the opportunity to be a broker.  The BM told me he appreciated me being a stand up guy, and that he respected my decision, and if I ever change my mind, to give him a call.


  At EDJ they've worked me like a rent mule: walking streets like a fool, working until 8pm for nights on end.  But they gave me the opportunity.  I thank them for that.  


  Then, all these little pity ass kick-back checks (I mean Revenue Sharing checks) starting arriving to my clients. "What is this for?" they would call, stop-by and ask.  Well, I would tell them the truth, and then I started calling STL and asking about what to do with them.  I got pretty upset with the folks in STL.  I was asking 5 people the same question, and getting back 6 different answers.   You never call STL and ask only one person.  Call a couple of times and see if there is any consistency to the answer.


  And then, my clients started showing up with class action lawsuit papers from the state of Missouri.  Are the two related?  Hell, I don't know.  EDJ is getting hit from so many directions, I feel like I'm sleeping with Mike Tyson!  So what did I do?  I called STL.    Yep, you guessed it, talked to five people and got six different answers.


  Now, I consider myself a straight talker.  I ain't being compensated well enough, and wasn't given any assets to be Jim Piddles Yes-Man.  When I get going, I tell you what I think.  I think I must have upset someone in STL. 


 Well, guess who showed up the very next day at my office?  You guessed it: the EDJ Internal Compliance Nazi. Coincidence? 


  He was there at 7:50AM, waiting on me.  Yep, he came in turned my office every-which-way-but-loose, but my office is too tight to find anything wrong.  And then he had a really stern talk with me about how all FA's are required to tell every prospect about account bonuses, revenue sharing, diversification trips, LP possibilities, every way we get compensated, etc....  Of course I tell my prospects and clients all of this.  Doesn't every koolaid sucker?


 How many of you Koolaid suckers are telling all this to your prospects?  Yeah, right.  Why don't you just tell them to run like hell.


 Since tax season ended, I've been playing a little golf.  I'm soul searching while i'm playing.   Jones told me the first two years are hell.  They weren't lying.  But the third and fourth year ain't too much better.  So i'm taking a little me time now. 


 The quiet of the golf course helps me focus my mind -and i meet the occassional rich guy too.  Try it.  I really enjoy it.  I like to get away from the office and think about my place in this business.  I think about what you guys write here while I'm out there too. 


  I went to play golf immediately after the EDJ audit Nazi left my office.  I came to a conclusion while I was on the 9th green: I am feeling like a monkey butt-screwing a skunk:  I ain't sure that I am finished, but I feel like i've had enough! 


 I reestablished contact w/ the wire last week.  I'm pretty sure i'm gonna do it.  I'm sure EDJ won't miss my assets.  I don't think I care if they come or not.  In fact, the wire said they didn't much care either.  Man, what does that say about EDJ? 


  My damn feet hurt,


 ED



GREAT post.  Run do not walk to the RayJay office.  You will NOT be treated this way.  Advisors are treated as clients.  Good luck.


But if you stay, you have noone but yourself to stay.  It only gets harder the longer you stay.



May 11, 2007 8:11 pm

Move your client statements to in depth from preferred or at a glance so you can have the cost basis available to you.

May 11, 2007 8:37 pm
EdJehovah:

 Well boys, I'm back to eat my crow. No ketchup please, I'll just eat it raw: feathers and all.


  I'm now gonna tell you the story of how this Texas Jehovah Warrior feels like a monkey butt-screwing a skunk.


  I met several times with and got an offer a few weeks back from a wirehouse.  I thought it over, for a long, long, long time.  Read my posts on this site.  Yep, there I went, sucking off Jones again.    


  I've been meeting EDJ expectations every month of production but six (four of which was while I begged for my office to get opened up).  I'm the last of my training class.  I feel like a confederate soldier on the Gettysburg battlefield after Pickets Charge: alone, alone, on a wide-wide sea.


 In fact, the BM at the wire jokingly stated they were interested in me because they were all so impressed I had lasted as long as I have at EDJ.  It appears they had a bet in their office about my tenure at EDJ  -I got mixed feelings about that one. 


 I'm the first and last man to open an EDJ office in my city in the past 6 yrs.


 The wirehouse BM told me, "son, i've seen your dedication.  You are going to make it in this business no matter where you are."  That made me feel better than anything any man has ever said to me. 


Then he started telling me about the opportunities to join a "team".   He didn't offer me money to try and crook the book.  Instead he offered me a salary for two years.  I liked the BM a lot.


 I've seen several IR's, I mean FA's, at EDJ who weren't qualified to wash my jock inherit 35+ million offices, their wives quit work, heard them boast of maxing out their 401k and Roth IRA's.  I've seen the Regional Leader hold them up like production superstars, and ask the audience if we would like one of these porn-style fluffers to call us with their best sales ideas.  Why can't we all be just like the porn star fluffers?


  Well, I told the wirehouse who offered me the job three weeks ago, No. 


  I'm a Texas boy, and I'm loyal to my brand.  Edward Jones gave me the opportunity to be a broker.  The BM told me he appreciated me being a stand up guy, and that he respected my decision, and if I ever change my mind, to give him a call.


  At EDJ they've worked me like a rent mule: walking streets like a fool, working until 8pm for nights on end.  But they gave me the opportunity.  I thank them for that.  


  Then, all these little pity ass kick-back checks (I mean Revenue Sharing checks) starting arriving to my clients. "What is this for?" they would call, stop-by and ask.  Well, I would tell them the truth, and then I started calling STL and asking about what to do with them.  I got pretty upset with the folks in STL.  I was asking 5 people the same question, and getting back 6 different answers.   You never call STL and ask only one person.  Call a couple of times and see if there is any consistency to the answer.


  And then, my clients started showing up with class action lawsuit papers from the state of Missouri.  Are the two related?  Hell, I don't know.  EDJ is getting hit from so many directions, I feel like I'm sleeping with Mike Tyson!  So what did I do?  I called STL.    Yep, you guessed it, talked to five people and got six different answers.


  Now, I consider myself a straight talker.  I ain't being compensated well enough, and wasn't given any assets to be Jim Piddles Yes-Man.  When I get going, I tell you what I think.  I think I must have upset someone in STL. 


 Well, guess who showed up the very next day at my office?  You guessed it: the EDJ Internal Compliance Nazi. Coincidence? 


  He was there at 7:50AM, waiting on me.  Yep, he came in turned my office every-which-way-but-loose, but my office is too tight to find anything wrong.  And then he had a really stern talk with me about how all FA's are required to tell every prospect about account bonuses, revenue sharing, diversification trips, LP possibilities, every way we get compensated, etc....  Of course I tell my prospects and clients all of this.  Doesn't every koolaid sucker?


 How many of you Koolaid suckers are telling all this to your prospects?  Yeah, right.  Why don't you just tell them to run like hell.


 Since tax season ended, I've been playing a little golf.  I'm soul searching while i'm playing.   Jones told me the first two years are hell.  They weren't lying.  But the third and fourth year ain't too much better.  So i'm taking a little me time now. 


 The quiet of the golf course helps me focus my mind -and i meet the occassional rich guy too.  Try it.  I really enjoy it.  I like to get away from the office and think about my place in this business.  I think about what you guys write here while I'm out there too. 


  I went to play golf immediately after the EDJ audit Nazi left my office.  I came to a conclusion while I was on the 9th green: I am feeling like a monkey butt-screwing a skunk:  I ain't sure that I am finished, but I feel like i've had enough! 


 I reestablished contact w/ the wire last week.  I'm pretty sure i'm gonna do it.  I'm sure EDJ won't miss my assets.  I don't think I care if they come or not.  In fact, the wire said they didn't much care either.  Man, what does that say about EDJ? 


  My damn feet hurt,


 ED



You're not gonna leave. You were too much of a pussy to leave a few weeks ago and I'm not hearing that your pussiness is in remission.

May 13, 2007 12:15 am

Do yourself a favor and at least look at a couple of good indy firms before you commit to another employer.

May 21, 2007 7:28 am

If you have found a good BM, check with the other FAs in his office to sniff out how long he is going to be there.  If it sounds like a while, make like a baby and head out.